Day 1.
Impress the hell out of your boss by not telling him to stop while he hands you reams, upon reams, upon reams of paper.
Impress the hell out of your assistant (I have a WHAT?) by telling her that a magnet can erase a hard drive and explaining how information is stored electronically. Introduce hex and binary to her vocabulary, ask her for a pile of information for next week, and set her loose on the floor and giggle while you hear wisps of "she's a WEALTH OF INFORMATION" wafting over cubicle walls.
Impress the hell out of yourself when you realize just how many projects you agreed to have working in February.
Panic momentarily when you realize February starts next week.
Panic extensively when you realize that the scope of these projects is bigger than your entire head.
Spend some time reading, taking notes, talking to all the people whose lives I'm about to make a living hell and telling them fun little things to take home in their hearts so that they hate me less later.
Find one page of discrepency between the 2001 document and the 2002 document and decide to go photocopy it before you give the past back to your boss
and discover one of the techies bent in frustration over the photocopier, apologetic, wired, upset.
Fix it for him.
Help him remove his jaw from the floor, and remember what it used to feel like to be god.
It's been a while, old friend.
Oh, and my boss wants me to take over all of his presentations.
People skills, he kept saying. People skills.
Dude, all I did was giggle when I shook hands.