Today I learned.
2003-07-10

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When I was fifteen I learned something new about myself every day. When I was fifteen I decided something new about myself every day.

I've stuck with a lot of them.

Today I learned a lot of things about myself.

Today I learned that Dave's drive-by afternoon kisses turn daunting tasks into Things I Can And Will Conquer.

Today I learned that my integrity has not yet entirely fallen, and that cajoling me into looking up "Marlene Dietrich" because "You look JUST like her" means nothing to me. I don't, and if I did it would neither affect the quality of my work, nor change my demands as to the quality of yours.

Today I learned that there are other people here with the same work ethic as mine, and that I am mature enough to be thrilled by their peerage, rather than threatened by their presence.

Today I learned that I'm not the only one who had to listen to "you're such a party-pooper, what do you mean you're staying in to study when everyone else is partying?!?"

Today I remembered a few things too.

But I also learned that this many days straight of no monstre-time fills up my brain, and today I didn't learn nearly as much as I could have.

But I DID learn that no matter how retarded I sound to my loved ones when my mouth motors on automatic pilot (as Steven has had so many opportunities to experience), I still scare the living hell out of other managers.

And every once in a while I catch myself using a word that I learned from this or that asshole or hero I've worked with and I realize anew each time --

I'm pretty good at learning.

To me, this is the most wonderful thing in the universe.

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2 comments on this spew so far

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Last few Rants:

I guess this is goodbye. - 11:57 a.m. , 2005-02-10
Endorphins, stress, and magickal mystery - 5:07 p.m. , 2005-02-02
stress, incoming - 4:42 p.m. , 2005-01-28
heaving great happy sighs - 3:05 p.m. , 2005-01-24
Imposter syndrome strikes again - 1:20 p.m. , 2005-01-19