The neat thing about chaos flux is that I totally missed PMS again.
I didn't get any sleep last night.
By seven this morning I was up and about, cleaning this, washing that, doing laundry by hand for the sheer sake of finding something to do.
By noon I'd vaccuumed twice.
The phone was still sitting on the kitchen table.
And being very conspicuous about it.
By 1pm, I decided to take a break, everyone was out for lunch anyway, and I had leftover tabouli.
By two pm I finally got up the guts to call Roxanne.
She was on the phone.
By 2:45 I managed to both call and get her to pick up.
She asked me if I'd gotten any sleep. I started blubbering and apologizing repeatedly.
She told me she understood, the whole gang of them spent the morning talking about what decision they would've made in my place, and apparently (but this is all hearsay) saying very nice things about monstres.
By 2:50 I was teary-eyed, weak in the knees, but ready to call Johanne and find out about my flight across the ocean.
Now she's not answering, but the hardest bit, again, is over.
Now I have my official list of moving stuff to do, posted to the wall, and the first item is checked off.
"Tell Roxanne I'm leaving".
Item two, asking Mr. Pyke if he's SURE he can handle a monstre as a roommate...
That's done too.
Items three through umpteen are in process. Some depend on others, but none are as complicated as a few of the projects I've had the opportunity to coordinate out here.
It gets easier every time.
Unlike airports and hotels and train stations, though, which have kept their importance but lost every possibly factor of intimidation...
I'm still going to cry.
But that's okay. I like crying. It's like an enema for my eyeballs. It must be good for me.