"The depth of your waist" he said.
I had to ask him to repeat it.
Someone fantasizing over the all-too-outdated exaggerated curve of my hip is too exotic an idea to swallow the first time.
The second time it is enough to set my loins on fire.
I am on my second cup of nouveau beaujolais.
Such things are celebrated out here, complete with pat� de fois gras homemade by Christophe for our gout� pleasure.
This dichotomy of goodness is more evidence of the hairline tear in my resolve.
I am not accustomed to the idea that my future is not a future to be spent alone, in pursuit of solitary goals.
This new seed germinating in my brain only grows all the greener with every perfect word from his perfect mouth.
"I'm glad I waited"
he said.
David, I repeated it a thousand times today, but I have no way to explain just how wonderful that is.
Just how huge it is that you turned around and improved upon the one thing that terrified me about you.
The fear of risks.
Well, if you're going to be a bastard and insist on being all wonderful and shit, well hell.
I may as well climb out of my hole for all it's worth and believe just as hard as I can
that maybe my plans aren't solitary anymore.
Fortunately, I have months left ahead of me before I find out just what kind of commitment I made in my heart last night and every night for the past months without realizing it aloud.
I have months of easy street while you decide where YOU will be living, before I have the simple decision of deciding that I have learned everything I needed to learn here, and have enough of it in my heart to follow you.
I think... I think I am capable of learning such lessons.
I think... I think I am capable of carrying europe inside me.
But it will take as much work as my first aikido forms, as much work as learning to walk, as much as learning not to talk the loudest in a conversation and learning to look for solutions to problems before despairing.
Work, however, I am unafraid of.